Searching

In the dark

During the day

Consume me

Crumple me to the thinnest

Non existent

I want to be non existent!

No eyes on me

Hating

Nobody speaking my fucking name

Light the flame its all the same

See me now in a few you wont

Built for this I was not

Fade

Fading away

Rid me of it all

In search of peace

Drown me in peace

Keep the world and all it holds

Peace please

The Past part 1

When you want to talk about your life where do you start? With the good or the bad? Honestly I am not too sure. I am just going to go back to certain events as far as I can remember.

The sound of our big screen Phillips television shattering came from the hands of my own father. He was in some type of rage this particular evening. Mother brought us home that night, it had been a causal day. She started cooking dinner as my sister and I settled in front of the television. I don`t remember what we were watching probably wrestling. The bat came crashing in to the screen. Chaos begin throughout the house within what felt like seconds my mother and her three kids were scrambling. The meal mother was preparing burning hot on the stove, he threw it off on to the floor.

I remember running in each room as my father tore the house down. No one was in sight for a moment. I ran to the back door that led to our patio. There he was… Holding my older sister by the neck. Hammer in his hand aiming at her head. His words to her in this moment were “You are not are Simmons your last name is Williams. You hear me?!” My sister nodded and said “Yes sir.”

To a seven year old that was just stunning, had me stuck in place he dropped her and sped past me. Then mother came and swept us out the door. From the backyard we were running, through the neighborhood on foot. My father jumped in the car. At least for twenty minutes maybe longer. We were hiding in bushes trying to make our way out the neighborhood. He had almost caught up with us a few times. Thinking about it now as an adult I`d compare it to a video game. My father the antagonist did not find us, end the there was not another fight. Some men were outside on one block, my mother quickly told them the situation and they let her use the phone. We hid in his bushes until our ride came. The car did make an appearance before we left. Those men did not say a word to him, we stayed with our aunt for awhile, she had three kids too. Eventually mother got us our own home, and we got custom to our new life together.

Thanks for reading!

Faded

I`m highly faded it`s hard to describe just makes me think.

 I still see you everyday this is not just word play I miss you, I need you. I`ll admit it was dumb of me too think there was anybody that could compete with you. I`m sorry. I say that too myself of course. Because your off with someone new sometimes I wonder if I show my face. Never mind that`s just cliche. I`m faded could`ve been my misses. I can make you my mistresses just joking. I know your a token funny how a joke can be found in misery. That shows me I`m not completely broken love does that too as great as it is love is not a friend. Which is why I have scars like the ones I gave to her.

On you

Kiss me kiss me like you want too 

Breathe through your nose I`m into you we not stopping till I cum

Call me spoiled boy thats on you

Draped me in all that new designer 

Gave me everything I asked  for I never heard the word no

Kiss me kiss me like you want too you say your through with me but is it true?

You picked up when I rung you

Say im spoiled thats you

You know I love you it shows

I never asked in the beginning no

This was what you wanted

A young fun  energetic bunny MUAH! 

Just kiss me!

Say I`m spoiled that on you!